


An Unusual Ice Breaker

by TrashySwitch



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Bubble Bath, Chaotic Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Dirty Jokes, Gen, Hot Chocolate, Light Dirty Talk, Thomas Sanders Loves The Sides, Weird Fluff, lee!remus, ler!thomas, ticklefic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-13
Updated: 2021-01-13
Packaged: 2021-03-17 10:42:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,159
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28723791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TrashySwitch/pseuds/TrashySwitch
Summary: Thomas somehow manages to come up with a good ice breaker activity for him and Remus to get to know each other. But gaining Remus's trust is hard...Especially when the smallest bit of hygiene becomes involved...
Relationships: Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders & Thomas Sanders
Kudos: 7





	An Unusual Ice Breaker

**Author's Note:**

> This fanfic has some mature jokes, a bit of dirty talk and a couple swear words in it. You have been warned. Read at your own risk.

Thomas had been trying to get to know a couple of the dark sides better. He had grown to know Virgil, and was now starting to understand Janus. But out of all the sides, Thomas found he often struggled to understand Remus. He knew that Remus was an impulsive side with a strange worldly view and a constantly dirty mindset. But...was there more to Remus than Thomas realized? That was what he was trying to find out. 

Now...finding out what to do with Remus, was probably harder than getting to know Remus. He got a general list of things he likes to do, but couldn’t really come up with a single activity, let alone a list. So, Thomas thought of a couple casual activities they could do. For the first activity: 

Thomas handed Remus a small, wrapped up present. “Open it!” Thomas told him. 

Remus immediately started to rip the wrapping paper. “Is it a vibrator?!” 

Thomas laughed. “Oh my gosh, no!” Thomas replied. 

“Awww…” Remus whined. 

“Just open it.” Thomas told him. 

Remus opened up the first present, and gasped upon seeing it. “A BROWN BATH BOMB! I can make myself look like I’m bathing in diarrhea!” Remus reacted. 

Thomas shook his head and chuckled in disgust. “Nohoho! It’s a hot chocolate bomb!” Thomas told him. 

“Oooooh...Wait-” Remus opened the package. “Are we...gonna make hot chocolate?” Remus asked, sounding both amused, yet disappointed at the same time. 

“Not quite…” Thomas smirked. He picked up a plastic bag, placed it onto the table and picked up two more plastic bags. 

“Marshmallows? Why are- Wait...Oh SPANK ME AND CALL ME JUDY!” Remus put the bath bomb down and threw his fists up into the air. “YES!” 

Thomas put down the last two bags of marshmallows. “We’re doing a hot chocolate bath!” Thomas told him. 

“AW HELL YEAH!” Remus got up immediately and hugged Thomas. “THANK YOOOUU!” 

Thomas giggled and hugged him back. “You’re welcome.” 

Thomas put the hot water into the tub, and allowed Remus to get into the tub. Remus practically melted as his chest soaked in the hot water. “Bath bomb please!” Remus ordered kindly. 

Thomas giggled and gave him the bath bomb. When Remus put the hot chocolate bomb into the bathtub, Remus watched it with wide, curious eyes as it disintegrated in the hot water. “ooOOOOOOoooh! It’s exploding!” Remus told him, watching as the chocolate bomb break open and fall to the bottom in a chocolatey powdery mix. 

Thomas grabbed a big mixing spoon to mix up the hot chocolate, and started to mix it all together. Then, Thomas placed the spoon aside and opened up two separate bags of marshmallows. “You ready?” Thomas asked. 

“Fluff me up, Mellow Man!” Remus replied proudly. 

Thomas dumped the two bags of marshmallows into the bathtub, and opened up another set of two. When they were ready, Thomas dumped them into the bathtub as well! “WOOO HOOOO! I’M THE MARSHMALLOW MAN! BOW DOWN TO ME, GHOSTBUSTERS!” Remus declared eagerly. Thomas bursted out laughing and bowed down to him. 

“Now, there’s only one thing missing:” Thomas told him. 

Remus looked up at him. What was he planning? 

Thomas opened up the closet door and revealed four separate bottles of whipped cream! 

“NO WAY!” Remus reacted. 

Thomas handed one of the whipped cream bottles to him. “Your Majesty.” 

Remus happily took it. “Thanks!” Then, Remus sprayed some whipped cream into his mouth. “Mmm, mmm, MM! Here comes the diabetes!” Remus yelled. Thomas wheezed and covered his mouth. 

Thomas sprayed some whipped cream throughout the tub water, and let Remus just hang out. “Alright! Can I see your chest?” Thomas asked. 

Remus tilted his head, but let his chest come out of the water. When he did that, Thomas shook the whipped cream and placed a whipped cream swirl onto both of Remus’s breasts. Remus bursted out laughing! “I don’t have boobs, ya dingus!” Remus joked. 

“I know. I just thought you might like a whipped cream bikini.” Thomas teased as he made cool whip ‘bikini straps’ up to his shoulder. Remus laughed more and showed off his ‘bikini’ with pride. 

After the whole bath was over, Thomas gave him a towel to dry off and grabbed a q-tip and a couple kleenexes. “I’m gonna clean out your ears. Can I do that for you?” Thomas asked. 

“No thanks. I’m good. Let me do it.” Remus replied, taking the q-tip out of his hand and shoving it into his own ear. 

“Wh- NO!” Thomas covered his eyes as Remus let out a surprised yelp of pain. Thomas sighed and rubbed his nose as dark, lukewarm blood spilled out of his ear. 

Remus felt the warm blood. “...Oops...” 

Thomas sighed and grabbed the q-tip. “Okay. On 3.” Thomas spun the q-tip gently and readied himself. “1, 2, 3!” Thomas pulled the q-tip out of his ear and looked at the blood on the q-tip. “Does this normally happen?” Thomas asked. 

“Only if I do it.” Remus admitted. 

Thomas sighed. “It’s because you’re shoving the q-tip into your ear and puncturing your ear drum.” Thomas told him. 

“Ooooh.” Remus admitted. 

“Meaning I will have to do it.” Thomas told him. 

“Oooooh! Looks like I’m getting the special treatment today!” Remus reacted. 

Thomas nodded. “You betcha!” Thomas replied. 

Remus laughed and nodded. “Okay!” 

Thomas started to remove the extra wax from Remus’s inner ear. But as he was doing it, Remus was pulling his ear away and pushing his hand away. “Am I hurting you?” 

“No, it...it’s nothing. Just be careful.” Remus replied awkwardly. 

Thomas nodded and put the q-tip into his ear. He lightly scraped the inner ear with the q-tip, and removed it with some wax on it. Flipping it over, Thomas put the q-tip back into his ear and started moving it around the inner ear more. 

Remus started to curl his neck to the side and move away again. When his ear wasn’t being let go, Remus shook his head to lessen the grip. “Sorry Thomas. It feels weird.” Remus admitted. 

“I know it does. But, we still have to do it.” Thomas told him. Remus whined and finally let him get closer. Thomas dipped the q-tip in one more time, removed some ear wax and threw the q-tip away. 

“Phew. It’s done.” Remus let out a breath of relief. 

“Not quite…” Thomas grabbed another q-tip and dipped it into his ear again. “I still have more wax to remove-” 

“Wah- Hey! Just let it go! Stop ihit!” Remus begged. 

“Why are you acting so defenseful over this? It’s just an ear cleaning.” Thomas told him. 

“It...feels weird.” Remus admitted. “It feels like a makeup brush being shoved into your ear!” Remus admitted. 

“Believe it or not, this is a normal piece of hygiene.” Thomas told him. 

“Ugh...Hygiene.” Remus muttered. 

“Hardy har har. Let’s get this finished.” Thomas grabbed his ear and started to remove the wax from the folds of his ear. But, Remus started trying to pull his head away again! So, Thomas sat him down onto the side of the tub and resumed his little chore. “Sit still.” 

“Ihit’s a little harder thahan yohohou thihink!” Remus started to smile and giggle a little. 

Now Thomas was REALLY confused. Why on earth was he giggling? What about this was so funny? Was Remus giggling at a joke he remembered? Or was he laughing at him? “You’d better not be laughing at me.” Thomas warned. 

“Ihihihi’m nahahat! Ihihi swehehehehear!” Remus started to giggle more and more. “Tohohohom, ihihihit tihihicklehehes!” Remus giggled, before muffling his giggles with his own hand. 

Thomas froze and stopped the q-tip. He slowly looked over at Remus with a surprised, but curious expression. “It...tickles?” Thomas asked him. 

“No.” Remus quickly replied. “Weeeell…” 

Thomas tilted his head a little as a thought went through his head. Thomas grabbed a cleaned makeup brush from Roman’s shelf and fluttered it onto Remus’s ear. 

The reaction was immediate! “Hehehehehey! Eehehehehahahahaha! Knohohohock ihihit ohohohoff!” Remus laughed. 

Thomas started to smile as the truth started to dawn onto him. “Remus, of all people, has ticklish ears?! I didn’t even know ears could be ticklish!” Thomas reacted. 

“Thehehey cahahahan, ahahahand thehey ahahahahare!” Remus laughed. “Nohohow stahahahap ihihihit!” Remus ordered. 

Thomas nodded and stopped using the makeup brush. “Okay. I’ll stop.” Thomas told him. Then, Thomas picked up the q-tip. “But I’m not gonna stop cleaning your ears!” Thomas warned him. 

Remus widened his eyes and squeaked in surprise! Even more wiggling and laughing ensued as Thomas struggled to clean his ears out. Remus wouldn’t stop shaking his head left and right. And no matter how soft or quickly Thomas removed the wax, Remus would end up either giggling wildly, laughing strongly, or even cackling like a witch. 

“Goodness gracious! I’m gonna need some people to pin you down the next time we have to do this!” Thomas reacted. 

“WEHE CAHAHAN JUHUHUST NOHOHOHOT?! WHYHY IHIHIS THAHAHAHAT NOHOHOT AHAHAN OHOHOPTIOHON?!” Remus protested. 

“Because cleaning your ears is important! Especially if it’s affecting your ability to hear.” Thomas told him. 

“IHIHI DOHOHON’T WAHAHAHANNAHAHA!” Remus whined. 

“Well too bad! You gotta.” Thomas responded. 

“NOHOHOHOHOHO!” Remus fell into another fit of cackles as the q-tip moved back to clean behind the ear. 

Thomas couldn’t stop himself from giggling at this. “I can’t believe I’m saying this...but I think the worst ticklish spot on your body, is the back of your ears!” Thomas declared. 

“AHAHARE YOHOHOHOU DOHOHOHONE YEHEHEHET?!” Remus asked. 

“Almost. I still have to get this hiiiidden little spot behind the bottom of your ear flap!” Thomas told him as he spun the q-tip to use the clean side. 

Remus whined amidst his laughter. “PLEHEHEHEASE HUHUHURRYYYYY!” Remus begged. 

“Will do! But only if you can stay still!” Thomas mentioned. 

Finally, after tons of struggles, wiggles and endless giggles, Thomas finally managed to finish the ear. It looked almost completely clean! Especially for Remus standards! “There. Can you hear better now?” Thomas asked. 

Remus was still a giggly mess of kicks and wiggles. “Whahahahat hahahappehehened tohohoho thehehe hohohot chohoholahate bahahath?” Remus asked. 

“The hot chocolate bath was already finished.” Thomas told him. “You’re as ‘clean’ as can be.” Thomas added. 

Remus nodded and conjured his clothes back onto himself. Then, Remus turned onto his side. 

“Oh thank you Remus!” Thomas reacted, placing a hand onto Remus’s arm. “I was just about to ask you to turn over.” 

Remus looked over at Thomas from the corner of his eye. “Whahaha- Whahahat?” Remus asked. 

“I still have to clean your right ear.” Thomas told him. 

He WHAT?! 

Remus widened his eyes and quickly covered his ear. “NOOOOHOHO!” Remus whined. 

“Come oooon, Remus! If you stay still and try to cooperate, it will take less time.” Thomas told him. “I promise. 

“Yohou cahahan’t promise shit! Ihihi’m ahaha wihihiggleher! I cahahan’t hehelp ihihit!” Remus told him. 

“Well, I can help you a little bit.” Thomas admitted as he sat onto Remus’s hip. “But you’re gonna need to try not to shake your head too much.” Thomas told him. Remus groaned and finally tried skittering his fingers onto Thomas’s belly. “HehehEHEHEY NOHOW! No! No tickle backs!” Thomas warned sternly. 

“Seehehe?! Nohot so eheheasy hoholding stihihihill, ihihis it?” Remus tried to tell him. 

“Frankly, no.” Thomas told him as he straightened up Remus’s head. “Now hold still. This will only take a minute.” Thomas let him know. 

Remus only smirked at that. “One, two, three, four-” 

“REMUS!” Thomas yelled.

Remus bursted out laughing at his reaction. “One two three four five-” 

“Remus, STOP.” Thomas warned one more time. 

Remus just smirked even wider and turned his head to look straight at him. “Onetwothreefourfivesixseven-” 

Thomas grabbed his arm, pinned it down in front of Remus’s face, and dug his fingers into the hip. “eeEEEEHEHEHEHEHEHE! OHOHOKAHAHAHAHAHAY! IHIHI GIHIVE! I-GIVE I-GIVE! STAHAHAHAP!” Remus cackled loudly. 

“See? The more you act like a little shit, the more I’m gonna tickle you for it! Now hold! Still!” Thomas ordered. 

Knowing Remus, one could easily predict that he was NOT gonna be able to hold still for long. He was bound to start making trouble, even if he was pinned down for hours. Thomas knew this was all just attention-seeking behaviour. The truth was, Remus wanted him to stay for as long as possible! And if that involved something taking forever, he’ll freaking do it! 

Even though Remus was a pain in the ass sometimes (Remus would proudly say something along the lines of “You betcha! Are ya thirsty for more?”), he was still a part of him. And Thomas just couldn’t be complete without him! 

A while later, Thomas would soon find other activities that would end up teaching Thomas more about Remus. And perhaps one day, Thomas would be able to see Remus as a rambunctious friend, rather than just an annoying child with a dirty mind. 

Someday, hopefully...


End file.
